-êΤ翴┢ -纞и - that's a little scary. - stop trying to wear me out.
笵盾 и谋眔癸"蛤萝"翴常ぃ庇稰 I think-you know, you have a real hang-up with the term "stalker."
ぃ и琌⊿痙種–ぱи痴繻柑瞷 No, l just fail to see how you showing up at my museum evey day...
ㄢ㏄ и常砆蛤萝帝 For, like, two weeks makes me the stalker...
瞷フê碞琌 When clearly it makes you the stalker.
程璶琌 癘 рも倒и The most important thing to remember here- hand, please.
硂筁ㄢる... These past two months...
琌硂ネ讽い Have really, truly been the happiest two months...
程е贾ㄢる - of your life. -
-и稲 -и稲 -倒 - l love you. - love you too. - there you go.
单单 癸ぃ癬 矹 W-wait. excuse me. son of bitch.
и㎝弧抉芕 I keep telling this guy no olives...
临ρ琌抉芕 硂琌拜肈  And he keeps bringing me olives, and that's a problem because-
-ぃ尺舧抉芕 -и癚菇抉芕 и癚菇抉芕 -you hate olives. - l hate olives! l hate olives.
笆 иㄓ穌﹚ Don't move. l'm on it.
 诀秆埃 There. crisis averted.
笵盾 硄盽и穦谋眔潸み You know, usually l would be completely disgusted...
璶琌Τрも秈и都柑 ぃ筁癸 With someone sticking their fingers into my drink, but with you,
碞讽阶 not so much.
龟悔 临柑磕宾狶笷笵 In fact, it, uh- mmm. it adds a certain melinda ''zestiness'' to it.
硂或弧 и临痷琌ぱ硑砞癸摆 Well, we make a good team.
絋龟 Yes, we do.
и瑍も丁 Well, l am going to go powder my nose.
腊Γ 璶琌狝叭ネ筁ㄓ Oh. do me a favor- if the waiter comes back...
窾琵и矹縷柑抉芕 Would you make sure there are no olives in my cake?
и尺舧硂妓 I like that.
狟吹 狟吹   琌 Spence! Spence. all right, man, it's time.
-ぐ或 -и璶―盉 - time for what? - it's time for me to get engaged.
癘眔盾 р硂竧柑 You were gonna put this in her sundae, remember?
-瓳 癸 苝ホ痷簘獹 - oh, yeah. right. nice rock.
-谅谅 Oh. thanks.
官璸 Oh, boy.
ぃ種 и惑棒 Oh. sorry. it was packed.
иぃ眔ぃ癸帝描ч乃 l just had to fight for a mirror.
ㄓ 竧琌硂ネ Here we are. a sundae for the gentleman.
ォ矹縷琌硂 And chocolate cake for the lady.
龟悔 и谋眔琌翴竧 и璶矹縷 Actually, l think that she had the sundae and l had the cake.
瓳 癸 Oh, okay, yeah. got it.
ê或 宾焊 So, Mel...
и蔼砍㎝и癬 I'm glad you stalked me...
... cause, um...
玡и眖ゼ笿ǎ钩硂妓... I never met anyone like you before...
瘤礛и и笵... And l, uh- l know that...
и穦ぃ ... We've only been dating a little while, but...
и碞谋眔 и眖ネ I just feel like l have known you my-
碞竒粄醚 My-my whole- my whole life.
腪盾 Are you chewing that?
瓳 иぱ 摆 Oh, my god! praise Jesus!
摆 焊ゅ и笵琌暗 Praise Jesus! oh, Calvin! l knew you'd do it.
祔单 рê倒и Excuse me one second.Just wanna take that-
и璶т狥﹁ Just a little quick search for something.
单 и皑ㄓ All right. be right back.
-и璶倒и洱ゴ筿杠 - -I'm calling mama. - hi. hi.
-癸ぃ癬 и谋眔Τ翴粇穦 -洱洱 - l'm sorry. l think there's been a mistake. - mama!
и皑璶挡盉 洱洱 I'm getting married, mama.
-  -ぃ種 êз琌и Ma'am? ma'am? pardon me. pardon me. that's my ring.
祔单 洱洱 Hang on, mama.
Τぐ或ㄆ盾 May l help you?
琌 Yes.
╆簆 и谋眔狝叭ネ L'm so sory, but l think the waiter...
倒竧岿 Mistakenly brought you the wrong sundae.
罖 ê琌иイイз You see, that-that's my grandmother's ring.
и某程иゼ盉ひ⊿祇鰐ぇ玡 I think you better go sit over there before my fiance? here...
簎畒 'whups' your ass.
璶ぃ硂妓 边繺衡и叫  Okay, how about l buy both of your dinners?
盾  ぃ筁и眔рêㄓ Good? yes. except l'm gonna need that back though, so-
腳ī 磣 okay, baby, ''whup'' his ass!
-腳ī 硂狥﹁琌 -硂狥﹁... - uh, baby, the thing is- - the thing is...
琌и单17τ⊿倒и狥﹁ I haven't waited 17 years on your sorry ass...
琵硂フ贺︰В瘆胊и璹盉祸Α To let this white shadow come and spoil my engagement.
焊ゅ 璶琌ぃ磣硂 It's either you whup his ass, Calvin...
и碞磣 Or l'll whup yours.
⊿岿 皑倒и瞒秨 Yeah. you need to go now.
- -洱洱 琌 - right. - mama? yes!
硂妓 ぃ OkUm, how about-
з簘獹 ㄓ摆 ъ搁摆 It's beautiful. Theifthey help!
рз临倒и give me my ring!
рз临倒и Give me my ring!
и⊿稱穦跑Θ硂妓 Well, this wasn't exactly what l had planned.
钮帝 и癬丁ぃ... Look. l know we haven't been together long...
笵讽痷稲ㄓ羬 But you know when something just feels right...
羆琌辨ウぱ And you don't want that feeling to end?
︽ 霉盞稼 痙帝癸夯ね量 Okay, Romeo, save it for your cell mate.
单 弟 琵弧Ч Whoa. Clancy. give the kid a minute.
-谅 -⊿闽玒 -thank you. - no problem.
杠祏弧 и稲 Long story short. l love you.
-и稲 -腀種 - l love you. - will, uh-
腀種 Will you, uh-
-腀種儿倒и盾 -琌 и腀種 - will you marry me? - yes, l will marry you.
︽ 尺 Okay. congrats and all that.
Τ舦玂↖纐 You have the right to remain silent.
┮弧ち常盢Θ绑靡ㄑ Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.
и眔ǐ I'm gonna go now.
官璸 璶㎝и筁ぃ盾 Dude, are you fuckin' with me?
紈柑 ノ"尺"ㄓ氮ゑ耕讽 Congratulations'' might be the more appropriate response here, Derek.
㎝穦ㄢる You've only dated her for two months.
и硂瓸痯痩临眔ぃゎㄢる㎡ I've had this cold sore longer than that.
硂碞琌挡筁Ω盉╧竒喷盾 This coming from a guy who's been married three times.
 碞⊿眖иō毙癡盾 Have you learned nothing from me, man?
и琌玡óぇ懦 I am a cautionary tale.
и琌瑿縬 и蠢┯踞竜筁 I am Jesus. l have suffered for your sins.
辨琌Ь please let that be a fart.
瑿 腳ī  痕舗紀 Yeah, baby! suck it, losers.
陪礛ぃ琌Ь Okay.that was definitely not a fart.
笵 You know,
ê"盌"笼硂狥﹁瞶洪琌璶俱и l think that ''biatch'' is feeding this thing indian food just to screw with me.
临痷┰ Yeah, you did a poop.
璶и腊传传盾 Any of you need changing?
-峨ㄠ ㄓ盾 -Hey, where's, uhwhere's Seth? he's up.
Γ帝т瞴 ⊿丁瞴 He's looking for a ball. didn't have time to stop at home and get his.
硂琌玂闹瞴繻 т瞴Τê或螟盾 We're in a bowling alley. how hard is it to find a ball?
 иㄓ All right! I'll take it!
╆簆 官璸 さ边и秈端痜虫 Sorry, fellas. l'm on the d.l. tonight.
官璸 玂闹瞴ゑ辽钩⊿Τ端痜虫 I don't think there's a disabled list for rec league bowling, buddy.
霉 或риメ倒硂ㄢア毖㎡ Ron, how can you abandon me with these two losers?
и⊿Τメ斌街 I'm not abandoning anybody.
и挡盉ぃ種帝и碞ぃㄓ硂 Just 'cause l'm getting married doesn't mean l'm not gonna be here for
把玂闹瞴辽 bowling night...
秅ソ敞辰 ┪糕此ㄢΩ︹薄馒粁甶 Or fishing weekend or jason's biannual ''porno palooza.''
笵 ぐ或常ぃ穦跑 You know, nothing's gonna change.
琌 и琌硂或稱 Yeah. well, that's what l thought.
ア抄 и诀竟 Now if you'll excuse me, l gotta get little shit machine...
赣洱洱êㄠ Back to his gold-digging whore of a mother, huh?
ар瞴盿ǐ摆 Hey, don't forget your ball.
иタ㎝カ坝秖... I was talking with the mayor...
禗р┷穦粿初羭︽ And l put a bug in his ear about having the reception at the opera house.
笵 洱洱 и稱穌虏虫盉搂 You know, mom, we were thinking of having a small, simple wedding.
㈱フ弧 宾狶笷 Honestly, Melinda.
иぃ琌腨候毙畕 We're not Amish.
и秨 l'll get it.
иゝゝ沧璹盉 Oh, my little sister's engaged!
痷簘獹 Hi, beautiful.
- Λ紈 -ぃ種 и钮ぃǎ - hi, Todd. - sorry. l can't hear.
常Γ He's always working.
琵и拜拜肈 Let me ask you something.
稱盾 Is it wrong to want to tap sister-in-law ass?
 и眔本 Right. oh. l gotta go.
克稲 honey.
-ぐ或 -硂琵稱癬и璹盉盾 - yes? - does this remind you of when we got engaged?
-иа癘㎡ -и寸Ω籩る - how could l forget? - let's go on a second honeymoon.
ㄇ憨よ 弧ぃ﹚ネ璂 Some place romantic. maybe make a baby.
êㄠ Hey, there's your dad.
糑 ㄈ Hey. Abe.
钮弧ê︹肕畍㎝〆ず风┰皑担ㄆ盾 Did you hear the one about the horny jockey and the venezuelan stable boy?
⊿Τ ぃ筁и稱钮钮 No, but l think l like it already.
痷 it's delicious.
顿 官璸 hi, guys.
弧璣粂 璣粂 Speak English, huh? English!
筿跌 Look, go watch some tv, huh?
-痷稲 -痷琌╆簆 - they're so cute. - sorry about that.
琌и材ヴρ盋ネ They're from the second marriage.
玡ヾ琵量炊硄杠 痷琵ぃ The ex only lets them speak to me in mandarin, the hairy ass crack.
羆ぇ anyway
-尺 -谅谅 - congratulations. - oh. thank you.
-倒 -讽礛 - here. - oh. sure.
腳ī筁眔盾 How's my baby?
и洱ρ璶蛤и弧盉搂ㄆ沸и My mother's killing me with wedding crap.
璶и减 и龟琌ぃ l seriously don't think l can take another year of this.
и╬゜ Mmm. well, we could just elope, of course.
ê穦炳и Then she'd kill both ofus.
稦ぐ或㎡ What are you doing?
 You.
-腳ī и常壳 -瓳 êタ - mmm! baby, we're in the panty. - oh! that's a good point.
稦盾 What are you doing?
-瓳 ぱ -┦稲筿辫  - oh, mygod. - # sex elevator# ding.
痷短 You are so stupid.
糑 官璸 禦翴穦盾 Hey. would it kill you to buy some groceries, man?
癸 狦產骸穦初 и穦 Yeah, if the mystics would cover the god damn spread, l could.
產 WNBA猔 The mystics? you're bettin' on the w.n.b.a.?
 Mm-hmm. well, hello.
 и琌Χ瓆 宾焊ㄆ Hi. l'm-l'mjudith. l-l work with mel.
 Χ瓆 и琌糕此 Oh, hey,judith. l'm Jason.
и琌霉程狟ね и眖 I'm, uh, Ron's best friend- since childhood.
硂琌峨 厩ね Yeah. and this is Seth, his college roommate.
ê琌紈柑 琌ρ And that's Derek. used to be his boss. yeah.
-眖ㄆ磕穨? -龟悔и眖ㄆ禣珇代刚 - are you all in finance? - actually, l'm in consumer products testing.
-紈柑 临㎝霉癬盾 -ぃ и -Derek, do you still work with Ron? - no. I, uh-
и瞒秨ê產そΤ皚... I left that company a while back...
ぃ筁 иㄌ礛眖ㄆ磕穨 But, uh, l'm still in finance,you know.
笵盾 ず壳Τ猀攫睲穝警笵 I'm telling you, man, she had a pine tree air freshener in her underpants.
и眔本 gotta go.
-暗ぐ或 -и琌眖ㄆ約穨 - what do you do? - l am in the advertising game.
-約? - advertising?
钮癬ㄓ縀 that sounds exciting.
⊿岿 絋 It is. yeah, it is.
Χ瓆 琌宾焊狟ね τи琌霉狟ね You know,judith, you're a friend of mel's and l'm a friend of ron's...
┮и谋眔и莱赣癬 So l'm thinkin' we should get together.
笵 ┪砛癬ゑ履 礛暗稲 You know, maybe- maybe grab a pizza, fuck.
ぃ腀種? ぃ尺舧ゑ履 No? you don't like pizza?
弧痷 Τ街ぃ尺舧ゑ履 Seriously, who doesn't like pizza?
糑 產繰 Hey, uh, eveyone? eveyone, um-
иぃ笵赣或弧 ... I don't know how to say this, but...
и㎝宾焊盉搂肅︹ぃ笷Θ璓 Mel and l simply could not come to an agreement on our wedding colors...
┮и∕﹚だも So we are breaking up.
龟╆簆 產隔み緍緋 Vey sorry. eveyone drive safe.
舧ㄓ 官璸 - yes! welcome back, buddy.
琌秨 He was kid- he was kidding.
癸ぃ癬 宾焊 - - sorry, mel.
⊿ㄆ It's okay.
羆ぇ ㄢる玡... Anyway, uh, two short months ago...
иǐ秈ひ孽瞷美砃痴繻 I wandered into the cleveland museum of modern art.
睝礚好拜 и癵隔 碞硂... I was, of course, lost, um, but then...
и程甶珇 碞琌宾焊 I laid eyes on the best exhibit in the whole joint- mel.
и笵ㄢる碞璹盉丁祏 Uh, no, l know that two months is an awfully short time to get engaged...
 弧龟杠 и材ぱ碞非称―盉 But, to be honest with you, l was ready to propose on that first day.
ぃゲ弧... So needless to say...
宾焊и―盉 иミ皑氮莱 When mel proposed, l said yes.
иぃ稱琵Τ丁 - - l didn't want to give her time...
э跑種 ┮и碞匡▆òら To change her mind, so we have set a date.
5る31ら 眖さぱ衡癬 る... On may 31 , one month from today...
舧ㄓ猾把и臩ぱ癸 You are all invited to our open bar-
硂琌盉搂场だ ぃ筁 笵 - which will also feature a wedding, but, you know- -
и碞量硂 產ぃ綤ぃ耴 All right, let's get drunk.
糑 紈柑 Hey, uh, derek?
或Гêㄠ Why is your kid dropping a deuce in that plant?
ぱ е氨ㄓ ぺ Jesus! stop it! bah! bah!
ㄈ и筁﹗﹗厨 Now, abe, l've taken a look at the numbers for last quarters.
иΤㄇぃ▆戈玻 硂柑 I think we've got some dead weight. here, look.
硂 Take a look at this.
-糑 官璸 -霉 秈ㄓ - hey, hey, fellas. -Ron, come in.
-ㄈ 尺舧耻б 癸 -讽礛 -Abe, you're a whiskey man, is that right? - absolutely.
ê и倒狹 All right, l got something here for you.
琵и沽沽硂皊 What have we got here?
揪 び耻 硂琌ぐ或皊 Oh, that's nice. what is this?
糕﹊此產30╬旅 Jameson's 30-year private reserve.
и琌稲焊孽 ┮и眔や瓣 и盿倒瞺 I'm half lrish, so l gotta support the motherland. l brought you a bottle.
琌稲焊孽? и洱洱ㄓむ焊 You're irish? my mother's from Galway.
產柑稲焊孽﹀参 痷琌び Geez, it's gonna be great to get some more irish blood in the family here.
笵 Λ紈琌璣瓣 иぃσ納êㄇ You know, todd here is english, but we try not to think about that.
-尺舧ぺ撤璛盾 -尺舧 - you like cubans? - uh, yes.
-谅谅 -沮и┮ 霉... - thank you. - from what l understand, ron...
琌穌计沮 You're a, uh-you're a numbers man.
⊿岿 ネ и琌磕臮拜 Yes, sir. l'm a financial consultant.
и琌穌计沮ō I started out as a numbers man.
ㄆ龟 霉 琵и稱癬淮 In fact, ron, you remind me a lot of myself when l was a young man.
иそ羆琌舧穌计沮 We can always use more numbers men in the company.
笵 瞷êㄇ琵癚菇畍び You know, it's overrun now with too man goddamn lawyers.
Λ紈 и⊿Τ碿種 No offense, todd.
拨澈 硂琌產壁穨 After all, it is a family business.
ネ 谅谅眤硂或眔癬и Well, uh, thankyou, sir. it's a vey generous offer.
ぃ璶ネ ㄈ иㄈ No, no, no. abe. you call me abe.
癬ㄓ惠璶耻ㄇ Λ紈 Looks likeyou need a refill. todd!
-琌 ネ -琵и耻翴ê瞺皊 - yes, sir? - let's go find that bottle of yours, huh?
-硂 或 - take care of that, would you? -
霉 So, ron,
钮弧ê︹肕畍㎝〆ず风┰皑担ㄆ盾 have you heard the one about the horny jockey and the venezuelan stable boy?
⊿Τ 钮ぃ或 No, but it sounds painful.
竒筁碭る Lt's been a great couple of months...
ρ龟弧 ヘ玡ゎ琌 And l can honestly say that you are the best two interns...
┮Τ龟策い程ㄢ We have ever had here.
ぃ┋ㄆ и沟赌 Unfortunately, we can only hire one of you.
┮ и璶程纔╭龟策ネ So... iet the best intern win!
沉 ノ ノ Get in there, maxie! get in there!
瞨ㄇ 瞨ㄇ Get angy! get angy!
硂痷竜 - oh, that's not good. -
- -霉 и琌Λ紈 - y'ello. - ronny, it's todd.
Λ紈 Τぐ或ㄆ薄或 Oh, hey, todd. what-what's goin' on?
и稱拜拜虫ō癸 Τぐ或璸购 Oh,just a little thing called your bachelor party. so what's the game plan?
临⊿璸购 L, uh, don't know.
иê腊官璸尺舧吹硷膀皊艫籖 My buddies are big fans of''two-for-tuesday'' lap dances at spanky's.
霉 硂琌程Ω虫ō╣舧 Listen, ron, this is your last hurrah.
и璶琵ウㄣ We gotta do this thing in style.
σ納 и放穢よ Thinkin' we fly somewhere warm, hmm?
耻蔓Ю皊 き琍皊┍ Where the drinks have umbrellas, the hotels are five stars...
Θ帮 The vagina flows like water-
琵瞡镑 Sweet, stickywater.
钮癬ㄓぃ岿 琌и狟ねも繷ゑ耕候 Wow. that sounds great, but some of the guys are on tight budgets.
ノそ窥や That's what the company card's for, right?
碞钩ㄈ弧 硂琌產壁ㄆ薄 I mean, like abe said, this is a family business.
谅谅築磏 иぃ场琵姐 Look, that is vey generous of you, but l can't let you pay for all that.
и谤宾焊и蔼砍 Look, l'm really happy thatyou're marying mel.
и種琌и稱璶 I mean, l always wanted a brother...
ぃ┋琌и洱洱眔Ν But unfortunately my mother died when l was prettyyoung.
и笵и⊿Τ﹀絫闽玒 Look, l know we're not blood or anything...
狦и秨虫ō癸杠 But, look, l would be honored if you would let me...
и穦谋眔篴┋ Throw my new brother his bachelor party.
 Λ紈 ê碞酚弧暗 Well- ofcourse, todd. yeah. absolutely.
伐 Awesome.
钮帝 瞷癬璶ヰ ρ Now listen, you probably want to get some sleep, bro-ham...
﹚惠璶緄ì弘 Causeyou're gonna need it.
Λ紈 洱洱ㄆ и螟筁 Wow, todd, l- l'm so sory about your mom.
и常ぃ笵 L never knew.
ゑ 洱琌畓醇盾 Billy, areyou fucking retarded?
⊿ 材Ω订も砃 She's not dead. she's in phoenix...
瞷㎝材ヴひ获澳 With her second husband and her third set of tits.
-痷癸ぃ癬 -琌摆 - l'm sory. - yeah. yeah, you are.
瞷钮帝 Now, look.
羘セ辊パYYeTs紇跌辊舱承陆亩籹 窽ゎノヴ坝穨︽ 舧祅魁粿阶韭ユ瑈 更 絬芠 www.YYETS.net
-----====陆亩=====----- 簈︽ Monkey 隒 ㄈ9 兢 癸き
и惠璶罙秆硂 霉﹁籜吹 I need recon on this guy. ron simmons.
и璶笵ち –灿竊 L wanna know eveything about him- evey little detail.
–常Τ畓翴 ゑ и璶笵畓翴 Evey man has his weakness, billy, and l wanna know his.
ρ狥﹁碞璶 и穦钡痁 The old man's steppin' down soon. l'm next in line.
и竒⊿㎝硂盋 I haven't been sleeping with this cow of a daughter for the last threeyears.
或琵硂趁ル铬ㄓ穖и Just so daddy's little favorite can come in and take it from me.
堡 ゑ Mmm. sadly, billy...
и稱璶挡ぃΘ盉 I just don't think this little union's gonna make it to the altar.
ǐ 禭и临睲眶 let's go! l'm still sober.
е翴官璸 玭─﹉甉单帝и㎡ Come on, man. the chicks in south beach aren't gonna fuck themselves.
- 宾焊 - 官璸 - hey, mel. - hey, boys.
и稲 稲 繷ǎ L loveyou, baby doll. seeyou soon. mmm.
硂琌稦ぐ或 Hey- oh! what's that for?
穝惠璶琿艫籖╭ Well, you gotta buy the groom a lap dance.
珼簘獹 Pick a hottie.
⊿ 硂碞琌и谤 See? that's why l'm marying you.
洱 oh, shit.
ê琌и材ヴヾ е е翴瞒秨硂ㄠ Lt's my first wife. let's go, let's go, iet's go, let's go!
-и稲 -е е е - loveyou. - go, go, go. come on, go!
稱発摆 睼矹 Nice try, asshole.
癘眔或 硂㏄琌盿 It's your weekend with your son. remember?
硂琌霉虫ō癸 Hey, it's ron's bachelor party.
ê琌拜肈 猜矹 That is your problem, shit for brains.
霉 尺 Ron, congratulations.
盉琌ンㄆ薄 Oh! marriage is a beautiful thing...
и稰蔼砍 And l am so vey happy foryou.
睼矹 Ass wipe.
谅谅 ︺礩 Thanks, irene.
и╆簆ぃ 痷框狙 I'm sorry you're not gonna be able to make it. that sucks.
霉 ó ǐ е翴 Get in the van, ron. tick-tock, tick-tock.
и穦 иネ⊿Τ贾届 All right, l'm goin', okay? my life knows no joy.
笵 や暮緄禣㎝ All l know is work and alimony payments and babysitting.
狦粄硂秅ソиぃ╣舧 So if you think l'm missing out on a weekend...
碞岿疭岿 Of drunken debauchey, you're sadly mistaken.
ぃ蛤帝 硂琌虫ō癸 ぃ琌ㄠ担籈穦 Well, he can't come with. this is a bachelor party, not romperroom.
-霉 -霉 - ron? - ron?
-霉 - ron?
单 硂琌 Wait a minute. this?
官璸 硂碞琌ゼㄓ┄诀 This is your future father-in-law's plane, man?
痷次 禣紈狶 Way to go, federline.
êΛ紈 ゴ衡や俱秅ソ禣ノ and this todd guy, he's gonna pay for the whole weekend?
и稱琌 yeah,l guess so.
钮癬ㄓ钩琌┦攀 sounds gay to me, man.
и璶ぃ璶ぐ或 Yeah, we don't have to put out, do we?
иぃ稱㎝﹋ひ祇ネ闽玒 Yeah, l'm not sleepin' with your brother-in-law, ron.
痷陪耚 what a douche.
и My niggas!
硂临︽或 Huh? what about this?
官璸 硂琌Λ紈 Λ紈 硂琌и狟ね So, uh, guys, this is todd. todd, the guys.
ネ и秨﹍ Gentlemen. let's do this.
-を︾痷簘獹 档︹瑈︽ -痷次 - nice sweater. l guess purple's coming back. - shotgun.
硂或蛤帝 Whoa. what's with the kid?
-ぃ璶踞み Θ剪 -び次 - oh, don't wory. he's the mature one. - perfect.
ぱ摆 - uh- oh, man.
-ぃ某 -钮帝 官璸 - what? what? - okay, okay, listen, guys.
常畒 或碞祏壳 Takeyour sea- why don't you have any pants on?
硂ぃ琌╬诀或 What, this is a private plane, right?
硂碞琌и留╬ Them's my privates.
 钮帝 ㄢ叭璶ㄓ An_ay, look. couple of flight attendants are gonna come out.
琌ㄇ矗眶 ⊿Τぐ或ぃ Go over some safety precautions. it's not a big deal.
- - - great. - oh, ladies?
- ╧ и琌耙甫 -и琌甫 - hello, boys. l'm mandy. - and l'm sandy.
и竒Г㏕﹚竚 And l'm in the upright and locked position.
び次 Yeah!
и穦︱霉ń笷隔狝叭 We'll be serving you all the way to sunny florida.
иΤㄢκ璣ń祘ㄉ び次 And l got two million airline miles. yeah!
紈柑  Hey, derek. offspring.
ぱ 单 Aw, geez. hold on.
筁ㄓ 宾焊║ иǐ Come on, ''melvoid.'' let's go.
 и傣μ 镍砯 Dad, it's tommy, dumb ass.
诀康┰柑诀 Go see captain lary in the cockpit.
-иぃ稱诀康 -┰柑诀 - l don't wanna go to the cockpit. - captain lary.
ぃ璶а癘揽Ь Don't forget to wipeyour ass.
狦辅 In the event of a water landing...
诀 You will find several flotation devices...
тノ簘疊砞称 On board the aircraft.
弧弧薄猵 ゑ Talk to me, billy.
и竒璹甅┬ 皊皊 I've checked you into the suite and made sure the bar is fully stocked.
-┬丁竚㎡ -иタ矪瞶 - what about decorations for the room? - l'm taking care of that now.
官璸 ぃ璶硂妓 琵и Guys, come on. let me out.
痷来眔或︽ You, sir, know how to travel.
常琌и Well, nothing is too good for my new bro.
- - all right.
Τ⊿ΤΩ㎝ㄢ﹉甉筁 Speakin' of which, have you ever had two girls at once?
絋ち弧⊿Τ ㎡ Uh, actually, sadly, no. but, uh, haveyou?
讽礛 璶ぃиぃ穦挡盉 Ofcourse, or else l wouldn't be married.
钮帝 Listen.
и璶琵и挡盉玡ЧΘ碪栏猭 l cannot let my new brother get married till he has had a hat trick...
и笵 And l happen to have it on vey good authority...
甫㎝耙甫種3P That sandy and mandy are, mmm, morally flexible.
и尺舧 And l love that about them.
痷 琌 I do, but, u_
иぃ笵 и稱硂秅ソ I don't know, l think this weekend...
и琌稱㎝癬 L just wanna hang out with you guys...
耻綤琌Э壳 And get drunk and maybe crap my pants.
-и临琌ゑ耕肚参 - - you know. l'm a traditionalist. - okay. you know what?
и穦琵êㄇ担瓁砏﹚常紀 I'm gonna let this little boy scout routine fly for right now.
и稱禗 let me tell you something.
и坝穨㎝ネ畒皇琌 My motto in business and in life...
玦┕玡 Is ''balls to the wall.''
蝶虫ō癸 Now, the mark of a good bachelor party...
琵非穝荷薄瞡р Is the bachelor getting laid early and often.
и穦膚购硂Ω虫ō癸 And the todd only throws the best bachelor parties.
 荷秖ㄏ胊 Ladies, do your worst.
官璸 ぃ璶恨и и痷ぃ璶艫籖 Guys, l'm-l'm fine. l reallydon't want a lap dance now. l'm fine.
单单 и糛ㄢ簑睲瑍盾 癠 Wait. can l just-a little purell first? like, two-two squirts, please?
超糒 灿颠╧ Shut it, germ boy.
ρぱ Oh, deargod!
-ǎ - - bye. - okay. all right.
谅谅  Thankyou, ladies.
瑿 耻Ч Yeah! drained it.
呼ǎ Seeyou on the internet.
祘ǎ Seeyou on the way back.
ǎ 谅谅 Seeya. thanks. whoa.
-临 -痷︽ - all right? - way to go.
邻μ碞耞ㄢ兵籏 峨痷︽ One minute in miami and two broken arms. that's ourseth.
ネ 猔種 硂琌ゑ All right, gentlemen. gentlemen, listen up. this is billy.
穦腊и逼硂秅ソ弘眒竊ヘ He's gonna be helping us out with the, uh, festivities this weekend.
-產或 -秈 - what's up? - let's check it out.
ㄓ オ  Come on. left, right.
-舧篺羆参甅┬ - welcome to the presidential suite.
иぱ 痷琵и硂柑 Oh, my god. they're really letting me in this place?
硂 Oh, look at this. whoo!
璶耣柑瑍峻 иぱ绑 Dip my balls in champagne, cause l'm in heaven.
 Λ紈 Groovy, todd.
洱 霉 и痷稱﹋ひ Damn, ron, l mightjust bang your brother-in-law after all, man.
瓳 临痷稱眔 Oh, well, thanks for that image.
ぱê Geez.
-临或峨 -琌 - you good over there, seth? - yes.
官璸 硂よ痷琌び次 All right, pal. this place is amazing.
-谅谅 -碞琌璶倒程 - thankyou. - aw, nothin' but the best.
瞷 и硚临Τ Now, there is one more stop on the tour.
官璸 ㄓゴ┷㊣ gentlemen, say hello to my little friends.
- - - gutentag. - hello.
 Guten tag.
疭扒窾烦 Long live hitler!
и睲眶 Just gonna- l'm gonna hit the head.
稱稦ぐ或 稱炳и或 What are you tying to do, kill me?
-糑 -琵秨 - hey. - move.
-薄猵 -临 - so what do we got? - all right, so-
-–┬丁常杆Τ尼钩 -伐 - there's a camera in evey single room. - perfect.
狦㎝街祇ネ闽玒 碞魁ㄓ If this guy so much as pops a stif_, we're gonna get it on tape.
ê紈瓣К矗疭扒 I'm telling you, that german chick said something about hitler.
и紈粂ぃ Τ翴琌﹚ My german's a little rusty, but l am pretty sure that she said...
弧疭扒窾烦 long live hitler.''
肞ㄇ峨 ㄓ暗集 Seth? relax, pal. get a massage.
и琌粄痷 硂ㄠ斑礢び I'm serious, okay? as the onlyjew here, all right...
и谋眔иΤ砫ヴ踞み I feel it is my responsibility to be concerned...
иね琌洪 That our roommates might be nazis.
官璸 钮и弧 All right, buddy, l'll tell you what.
狦临稱獻猧孽 и祇 Ifthey even think about invading poland, we'll let somebody know.
非称或 霉 耻皊丁 官璸 All right, ronny. gin and tonic time, buddy.
ㄓ и秨 Oh, fire it up. ahhh.
癠ê妓 Will youjust drop it, please?
┦и⊿Τ種ǎ Hey, l'm cool with your sexuality,
и琌ぃ尺舧ê贺暗稲よΑ Lt'sjust, l don't swing that way, man.
倒и璉额ň盼流ぃ穦琵Θ┦攀 Look. asking you to rub sunblock on my back does not make you gay.
痷 蠢ゴも簀 Seriously. you might as well have asked me for a handjob.
-痷琌跑篈 -糑 - okay, that isjust sick. - hey.
и籇蔓Ю皊竮笵 L smell cocktail wieners.
⊿穌岿 What?
т Eureka.
- -稦ぐ或 - okay. - what are you doing?
セぃ笵ぐ或琌SAA You don't even know what the s.a.a. is.
琌瓣綪扳羛穦ぐ或 It's sales associates of america or some crap.
琌酵ㄇ綪扳㎝ヘ夹龟瞷ぐ或 Just, you know, talk about selling and goal realization...
㎝ㄇΤ闽狥ェ霉猾吹Ь杠 And all that other tony robbins shit.
иぐ或娥ガ吹 Why am l tubbs?
ぃ琌霉膀疭 Becauseyou, sir, are no crockett.
弧痷 硂ㄠㄓи临Τㄇ候眎 To be honest with you, l was a bit nervous coming here.
讽иΩ羭快┦稲╣拔籈穦 When we first proposed a sex addicts anonymous retreat,
產常ぃ種 people rolled their eyes.
临弧爱羇籈穦 the were, like, ''why notjust call it an orgy?''
穦フ Oh, no, you'll see.
硂ㄇ籈穦Τ吏挂 These retreats offer a vey supportive environment...
и獀励腊и確 Where we can focus on healing and getting on the road to recovey.
硂秅ソ ┦穦环瞒и福 This weekend, sex will be the farthest thing from your mind.
и稱и暗眔临ぃ镑 I can't get enough ofthat-
-猧炊 尺舧簀癸 -ê琌ぐ或 - you like guns, pop? - what is that?
倒и贱彻êぱ 琌иネ㏑い程ぱ The best day of my life was the day they gave me my 10-year chip.
舧 и默璊︱ 狥玭跋羆掉 Oh, welcome. l'm sue hoover, president of the southeast chapter.
默 蔼砍粄醚  Oh, nice to meet you, sue- all of you.
娥ガ吹 琌跋 硂琌盾 So what chapter are you from, tubbs? is that your first name?
龟悔 ê琌﹎ actually, that's his last name.
иェ 琌и穎郎风 Yeah, l'm sonny and that's my partner rico.
и琌い﹁跋 Yeah. and we're from the midwest chapter.
舧 ェ㎝风 - welcome, sonny and rico. - yeah.
把硂笆 So, how long have you two been in the program?
-揪 ぃ琌 -弧 风 - oh, not vey. - well, speak for yourself. rico...
穦и竒 ぱ 钩Τ20 Cause l've been a member for, oh, gosh, like, 20 years.
-20 ぱ -琌摆 - twenty years? my goodness. - yeah.
и碞秨﹍ yeah, l got started really young.
и份份琌穦 Ν碞秨﹍毙и my grandpa, he was a member, so he started teaching me early.
讽み 默 Oh, careful there, suzyq.
êㄇ狥﹁甧舵 眔み翴 Those things are a little tricky. you gotta be careful.
и份份㎝担瓁ぇ丁 Yeah, you know, between my grandpa and the boy scouts...
-钩иSAAτネ妓 -担瓁? - it was like l was just born to be in s.a.a. - the boy scouts?
癸摆 и担瓁犁ㄨ璚ノ Oh, yeah. l did a lot of hustling in the scouts.
眖ぱだ皌竧较攫竧较攫 Yeah, with the christmas tree lot in the winter...
甃ぱ產め崩綪 ぃ璸基 And then goin' door to door in the summer time- whatever it took.
и钉弧и琌ǎ筁程次 - my scout master even said l was the best he ever had. -
-и⊿ㄆ -⊿ㄆ - l'm fine. -are you all right?
 ぃ璶ノ讽谨ㄆ格 Okay, let's not bore the nice people...
ㄓ沸耑 ェ With faded childhood glories there, sonny.
-风 ê琌盾 -垛? - hey, rico, isn't that your kid over there? - hmm?
癸╧┦包洛ネ稰ぃ骸種 Not a lot of women are comfortable with a male ''vaginacologist''...
иΤ骸種痜 But l have many, many satisfied patients.
-иタ钡箇 -眔 - l am booking appointments. - come on.
-ê或 ī甫 -垛? - so, uh, betty. - hmm?
单穦ㄠ稱耻狹盾 You wanna maybe grab a drink later?
笵 ノ︽杠弧 имォ秤 You know, talk shop? I could always use some pointers on my technique.
盾 Okay? man.
-и璶倒觅坝ゴ筿杠 - - l need to call my sponsor. - mm-hmm.
官璸ǐ 叉︾籖ぃ穦单и Guys, let's go! the stripper's aren't getting any younger.
-ェ ェ -糑 - sonny! sonny! - hey!
ī甫 或┰ Betty, what's-what's goin' on?
⊿ㄆ 琌ぇ玡蛤册ぱ獶盽秨み Nothing. l just really enjoyed talking with you earlier.
揪 琌盾 êび Oh, well, th-that's cool. yeah.
砛 砛и癬锣锣 Maybe, uh- maybe we should hang out, you know?
-で履 礛暗稲 -и临ッ环常ぃ穦璶―㎡ - grab a pizza, fuck? - l thought you'd never ask.
-ぐ或 -иぃで履 礚阶 - pardon? - well, l don't eat pizza, but whatever.
 单穦ㄠǎ Gentlemen, l will see you later.
ê迭眖ㄓ⊿恨ノ筁 硂琌繷Ω That line has never worked. I mean, ever.
璶ぃ琌ㄓ炳 и穦ぃ I'm gonna be really pissed if she doesn't murder him...
┪ぶ澄奔登 Or at least harvest a kidney, man.
ê葵恨﹚骸痜颠 Ugh! that-that pole's gotta be covered in crabs and herpes...
Τぱ惧眔 And god knows what.
┋и传ㄇ箂窥 I am so glad I cashed in my 401 , man.
 硂娩Г gentlemen, this booth's us.
ㄓ Come on.
ゴ耑 ﹋ excuse me, ladies.
и癚菇耑睹狐 иΤ拜肈 I hate to interrupt this meeting of the minds, but I got a work question.
街稱暗きだ牧窾遏窥 Who wants to make $10,000 for five minutes of work?
绊 绊 癸 硂碞癸 硂碞癸 Oh- back, back. yeah. there it is. there it is.
非称碞 Get into position.
и蹦祍ㄓ Oh! the conquering hero has returned.
-糑 ⊿穌估 -獺и ㄠ - hey, that didn't take long, man. - trust me, dude.
竒ぃ︽ и琵瞡镑 г She couldn't take much more. l fucking killed it- ninja style.
-琌盾 妓 е繰? -笵摆 ⊿岿 - oh, yeah? what, like fast and silent? - you know it, brother. yeah.
罖 êК痷钩淮玭觹柑 Hoo. check it out. that chick's a dead ringer for a young nancy reagan.
-或 -и稱稦玭觹柑 - so? - I always wanted to fuck nancy reagan. yeah!
и尺舧城┰焊禣┰霉 I was always fond of geraldine ferraro.
-┦稰 -ㄓ 虫ō簙 - vey sexy. - come on, bachelor.
VIP丁Τ穦 You've got a date in the v.I.p. room.
VIP丁 ぱ Go to the v.I.p.- oh, my god.
笆陈 Whoa! you're-you're vey nimble.
糔 翴玪ㄠ Τノ Shh. save your energy. you're gonna need it.
и莱赣挡碭Ω盉 I've gotta get married more often.
砛ブ盿莱赣Ι帝 ぃ琌盾 Maybe the belt should stay buckled though. no?
霉猾 洱ㄓ筿杠弧 Robin! your mommy's on the phone.
-イイみ纽痜祇 -イイ - your grandma had a heart attack. - nana?
癸 Uh-huh.
ぱ 痷┤ и... Oh, my god. that's horrible. I-
-碞硂ㄠ帝 克稲 -糑 稦估 - you're not going anyhere, baby. - hey. hey-ah!
糑 ê琌┰渺 Hey. hey-that's a zipper.
-瞷竒秨 -糑 簎秨 - that's happening now. - hey, back of_
-琌и -だ - he's mine. - you can share.
ぐ或 揪 ぱ What? what? oh! oh, lord.
-镑 и籐 -盌 - maybe we've had enough. that's my leg. - you fucking bitch!
ぱ 摆  Holy shit. come on, guys.
е洱ǐ秨 get the hell off of him.
叉︾籖ゴ琜罢 Yeah! stripper fight!
癬ㄓ ǐ秨 - - get of_ get of_
Λ紈稱稦ぐ或 What is todd's deal?
稱竚иぃ┚临琌竚и Is he tying to get me laid or get me killed?
-糑 官璸 临Τ篏猭㎡ -琌摆 - hey, man, there are worse ways to die. - yeah.
ㄠ à辅柑êК Dudes, that chick in the corner...
и穞癳猧 钩ろ Is throwing me signals like she's johnny fuckin' bench.
癸钠帝絬繷 She's paying more attention...
ゑ癸稰砍届 To the floating lint than you, dude.
 临琌册タㄆ All right, let's get down to brass tacks, okay?
-霉 非称挡盉盾 -и稱琌 - are you ready for marriage, ron? - l think so. yeah.
瓳 ê或非称蛤ユッ Oh. so you're ready to say good-bye to blowjobs?
硂琌璶ㄆ Cause that's the first thing that goes.
┮Τ盉包常ぃ倒╧ユ Married women don't give blowjobs. it's a union thing, man.
礛┮荐稲砰▅笲笆 And then your sports that you love...
琌璶癸禜 That's the next thing you can kiss good-bye.
-宾焊尺舧砰▅ -ぃぃぃ - mel likes sports. - no, no, no.
琌杆尺舧 They pretend they like sports...
碞钩и杆帝尺舧蛤量杠妓 The same way we pretend we like talkin' to them.
挡盉斑砰▅笆 The only sports you're gonna get when you're married...
琌克次瞴 Is little league t-ball.
и琌筁ㄓ 獺и 霉 And l've seen that stuff. and trust me, ron.
笵盾 场だ碍痷癚菇 Most of those kids really fuckin' suck, okay?
临管奔程舦 And by the time they take away the last thing...
耻皊 礛碞礚ネ届 That gives you any pleasure at all- booze-
竒а琌ぐ或е贾 You've forgotten what happiness is.
程逞催 So now you're just walking around...
硂︽ǐ An empty shell of the man you once were.
讽瞒秨 霉 And that's when they leave you, ron. hmm.
穦嘿ぃ琌╧ Claimin' that 'you're not the man l married.''
τ临弧 Well, no shit, hey?
谅洁 硂ㄠ临Τ癸搂 Thanks for playin', and here's a parting gift.
ㄑ㎝⊿Ч⊿季緄禣 Child support and alimony right up the ass.
硂碞琌盉 霉 And... that's marriage, ron.
非称盾 You ready for that?
и璶ЭЭ - I'm gonna go pee.
-㎡ - - yeah? - yeah.
и璶翴媚 I need some pills.
- иㄓ腊 -谅谅 - oh, for god's sakes. let me help you with that. - oh, thanks.
稱び и琌ぃ穦腊揽Ь Just don't get any ideas. l'm not gonna wipe your ass later.
иρ狟ねゎ礹媚 Ooh. my old friend codeine.
-иㄢ  -ぃぃぃ - nice. two for me, one for you? - no, no, no.
-и惠璶ê狥﹁ -单 - l need that stuff. man. - wait a minute.
-㎝硂癬耻盾 -耻杠穦翴 - can you drink with those? - it's way better when you drink.
班皊ぃ穦Τㄆ One beer is not gonna be a problem.
眔 盉筁 霉 иぃ惠璶ウ Aw, come on, man. marriage is outdated, ron. we don't need 'em.
癸 иッ环常ぃ莱赣 倒щ布舦 Yeah, we never should have, uh, given women the right to vote.
 碞硂妓 Okay, that's it.
抖ㄤ礛 盾 Let's take it easy, shall we?
籔腊瑈猐癬痷琌憨憨 - it's been kind of a long night, what with the gang rape and all. -
ぱ иㄓ癳何┬丁 Oh, god. I'm gonna walk sleeping beauty back up to his room.
-癬ㄓ罢 -瓳 и璶堕癸 - come on. - okay. l gotta go to the garden party.
 み み - okay, careful. careful. -
 硂妓癸 Okay. that's good for you.
 ㄓ盾 临琌 You guys, uh- you guys comin', or what?
ぃ и临琌硂ㄠ No, l think l'm gonna stay here, man.
ê娩êК―и㎡ That chick over there is beggin' me for it.
иぃ稱岿筁栏 l'm not gonna miss this.
讽礛ぃ穦 Why would you?
峨 Seth?
 筁憨ぱ He's, uh- he's had kind of a long day.
-﹚筁琘何谋丁 -癸 - it's definitely past someone's bedtime. - yeah.
ぃ種 癬ㄓ罢 官璸 - sory about that. come on, pal. -
ǐ 綼 Here you go. oh, geez.
ê或 璶╃酚盾 So, uh, do you wanna take a picture...
临琌и倒眎礶磞 Or should I give you a piece of paper so you can sketch them?
-╃酚 -揪ぃ 癸ぃ癬 癸ぃ癬 - take a picture. - oh, no. I'm sory. I'm sory.
и眖ひ孽ㄓ иt I'm from cleveland, and I was noticing your shirt.
-琌糕﹊吹捣盾 -иㄓひ孽 - are you a browns fan? - my father is from cleveland,
┮иΝ碞砆瑍福 so I was brain washed early.
и琌肕钉捣 び琵и端み I'm a cavs fan, but they're breaking my heart right now.
癠 扒ガ - - aw, come on, lebron.
-щê或瞴 -猳 扒ガ - shoot less commercials and more free throws. - come on, lebron.
-ê或琌肕钉臟膘捣? -ウ琌и臸〨 - so you're-you're a big cleveland fan, huh? - such is my curse.
瑈иō He's drooling on me now...
и莱赣ǐ 蔼砍粄醚 So l should probably go, but it was nice meeting you.
-и琌 - ǐ  - you too. - all right. come on, little prince.
 扒ガ Bye, lebron.
糑 и琌宾焊 叫痙ē и祔筿 Hey, it's mel. leave a message. I'll call you back.
糑 腳ī 琌蛤拜 Hey, babe. just callin' to say hi.
и稱 I missyou. um-
钮痙ē倒иゴ筿杠 Gimme a call whenever.
蛤弧 稲  I'll talk to you then. love you. bye.
边 Guten abend.
ㄓ 霉 balls to the wall, ron.
и稱и策篋何‵祇 Yeah, you know, I think I'm more of a couch sleeper.
边  Aufwiedersehen, ladys.
揪 硂╧或ㄆ Oh, what is wrong with this guy?
街穦碞硂妓ǐ秨㎡ Who walks away from that?
-眶眶 眶眶 紈柑 -ī焊孽紈ドμ - wakey, wakey, d. - uh, nacho bellgrande.
-Ν ﹋ -Ν - morning, ladies. - rwomenj guten morgen.
и硂ㄠ There is my book.
-揪 и -谅谅 - oh. I did- - d_n_eschd'n.
и考 ê I set a banana on- it wa-
ê It was-
ぱ Oh, god.
ぃ弄疭扒ē She wasn't just reading hitler's manifesto, okay?
临购翴 êㄇ琌洪 She was highlighting it. those girls are nazis!
碞衡琌 琌稴洪 ┦稰洪 Well, maybe, but they're hot nazis. ''hotzis.''
綼 What the fuck.
-糑 硂洱琌ぐ或 -ぐ或 - hey. what the hell is this? - what?
硂 硂琌ぐ或 This. what is this?
-琌挡盉з -иぐ或 - that's your wedding ring. - my what?
挡盉з 琎边挡盉 ぃ癘眔盾 Your wedding ring. you got married last night. you don't remember?
-ぐ或 -⊿岿 ǐ - what? - yeah. after you guys left...
つま皊柑êК ǎ灵薄 He went over to that little chippie at the bar and they actually hit it off
ㄓи耻翴皊 铬翴籖 then we went out and had some drinks did some dancing.
笵盾 ぇ玡 и猧毙绑 Beforeyou know it, we were in a little chapel in boca.
и琌︸ I was your best man.
琌︸? 琵и谤? 綼 You were my best man? you let me mary her? what the fuck!
и篴┋淋叫 ρ I was honored to be asked, buddy.
  Oh. okay, guys.
 и砆瑼 痷 Ha, ha, ha. I've been punk'd. vey funny.
-腇и癸ぃ癸 -⊿Τ - you're fuckin' with me, right? - actually, I'm not.
иΝ常单 倒挡盉靡 Been waiting all morning to show you your marriage certificate.
癸 硂狥﹁快靡碞 Yeah, yeah. could have got this done at a kinko's.
璶2だ牧  痷 Two minutes. ha, ha. vey funny.
礛临Τ魁钩 Then there's always the video.
и璶挡盉 I'm gettin' married!
и稲ェ哉划焊玭紈吹 I'm-I'm in love with sonia hernandez.
街琌ェ哉划焊玭紈吹 Who's sonia hernandez?
-洱 Λ蝴疭 -痷盾 ? - that's your new stepmom, twit. - seriously? again?
ρ 秨 Dad, tell me this is a joke.
钮帝 иぃ癘眔祇ネぐ或ㄆ Look, l don't remember what happened.
ぃ癘眔? ┏或ㄆ You don't remember? what is the matter with you?
猔種篈 и琌ρ Okay, you hold on, cause l'm still your father.
琌盾 絋﹚ Τи痷ぃ笵 Oh, you sure? cause sometimes l don't know...
街琌街琌 Who's the adult and who's the child.
┮界 睼矹 Thanks a lot, ass.
佩尺虫ō癸 Surprise bachelorette party!
谅谅  - thank you. hi. -
霉 笵иぐ或稲蔼焊ひ盾 You know what I love about golf, ron?
-ぐ或 Λ紈 -ウ㎝Τ硄ぇ矪 - what's that, todd? - it just has so much in common with women.
и種琌 ウ琌程程地腞 I mean, the finest, most gorgeous courses in the world...
琌程禥程螟揭祘 Are also the most expensive and the most difficult.
и種琌 иぃ L mean, sure we like to kick around...
沽刚ぃ With a shitty little par three now and again-
璶狟ね⊿ 癸 - long as our buddies don't see us, right?
蔼焊ひΤよ The beauty of golfis variety.
ぃ稱–ぱ常瑌 You don't want to play the same hole evey day.
ㄏ尺舧眖 Even if you are playing the backside.
肂 ê Well, that's, uh-
ê Λ紈 и稱и琌盡 That's beautiful, todd, but l think l'm more ofa one-hole kind ofa guy.
иΤ瑌 L'm a three-hole man, myself.
癸 Right.
 官璸 弧и妓т翴贾㎡ All right, boys, what do you say we make it interesting?
-500 -临琌100 - five hundred a man. - uh, how about we keep it to 1 oo, huh?
-иェ瓆砏玥ㄓ -ぐ或琌ェ瓆砏玥 - and we play kennedy rules. - what are kennedy rules?
碞琌疭紈ェ瓆 盾 Ted kennedy. all right? yeah.
ゴメ瑌 籃皊 ゴ‵柑 眔籃皊 You lose a hole, you drink. you hit it in the sand, you drink.
狦峨窱ぃ瞴 и常籃皊 Seth ''whiffs'' the ball, we all drink.
-иぃ稱 -ゲ斗眔 - l don't even want to play. - well, you're gonna.
и瑌瑌ゴ 砏玥э跑 We played at the putt-putt. the rules will transferjust fine.
そキ и璶Λ紈猭 Fair enough. we're also gonna playtodd rules.
ぐ或琌Λ紈猭 What are todd rules?
叉︾蔼焊ひ メ瑌 叉ン︾狝 Strip golf. lose a hole, you lose some clothes.
и禗筁琌в 块 е倒窥 L told you he was a 'mo. come on, pay up.
ぃ琌и叉 琌瞴担叉 Not us. the caddies.
ê碞ぃび钩в 或 Oh, and that's less gay how?
ê碞琌и瞴担 Those are our caddies.
 ル Hey, guys.
ぐ产ぃㄓ ﹋﹋穦ㄓ Hey, ashley couldn't make it, but her sister is coming.
ㄓ Oh. here she comes now.
╆簆иㄓ边 и﹊舗琵иび螟 Sory l'm late. my bunions are killing me.
-и璶硂 -单单 -琌и - l call this one. - wait, wait. - she's mine.
さぱ痷琌禫ㄓ禫М Oh, this dayjust keeps getting better and better.
ぃ иぃ耻 ぃ Oh, l can't. no!
 All right.
ぱ罢 Oh, god.
爱狹 官璸 - upyours, buddy. -
み瞴 癶 癶 - fore! - comeback.comeback.
ぃ秈 Miss it.
ぃ秈 ぃ秈 Miss it. miss it.
玭 玭 Noonan. noonan.
硂钩杠估 Oh, yeah. that's my boy!
狦и⊿穌岿 霉 Let me get this right, ron.
êК淋叫材19瑌 Your smokin' hot caddy asked you to play a 1 9th hole...
砆┶荡 And you said no?
 и眔琌ぃ琌в Dude, l'm gonna have to checkyour balls for gay.
癸ひヾΤ┮罙秆盾 Areyou remotely familiar with how monogamyworks?
-⊿Τ -  钮帝 - no! - all right, boys, listen up.
さ边иΤ疭璸购 - -tonight l got something special planned.
и把娩癸 We're going to the biggest party down at the beach.
礛и硂柑耻皊ぱ獹 We're comin' back here and we're drinkin' all night.
ぃ ヰ All right? get some rest.
и眔玦┕玡 We're goin' balls to the wall.
-峨⊿ㄆ -⊿ㄆ - is seth okay? - he's fine.
よ и暗び笲笆 L, on the other hand, got way too much exercise.
痷琌М伐 Kh. wunderbar.
璶盾 Mmm. youwant?
-ぃ - - nein. - allright.
-纞? -糑 - scared ycat. - hey.
獺盾 闽划焊玭紈吹畉ぃΤ12 Can you guys believe this? there's, like, 1 2 pages of hernandezes in here.
邻盞 ぃ某 Ln miami? shocking.
и或快 狦–常ゴ75 砛 Here's what we'll do, okay? ifeach ofus phones 75- right? that should work-
单单 傣μㄠ Wait a minute. where's-where's tommy?
ェ 盾 ェ Sonny? hello? sonny?
-糑 琌 -糑 - hey, hey, you. - hey.
-硂琌╲甊 - - this is shawna. - hi.
钩骸ìи妓骸ì盾 You thinkyou can take care ofher the wayyou took care ofme?
弧㎡ 讽礛 单 Does the pope shit in the woods? one second.
琌ゴ戒块临琌ぐ或 Okay. did you girls lose a bet or something? huh?
腊も Daddy's little helper.
 叫猔種 иㄓ Look out, ladies. here l come.
狟ね 虏琌ぃ某 Your friend- he'sjust amazing.
ぃ某ネ耴ㄓ mr. amazing is back.
 All right.
-穦ǎ -官璸 р筿杠痢倒и - l'll catch you guys later. - hey, man, gimme the phone book.
иㄓ腊 l'll helpyou out.
而乃 и边贾场单よ暗盾 Autumn, can we do this tonight, at, like, a club orsomething?
硂ㄇㄓ硂ㄠぃ琌ㄓ抄虫ō These guys are not here to play bachelorette games.
ㄓ硂ㄠ琌ㄓ筁皊舽 They're here to feed their drinking problems.
ирち常逼 L have eveything all set up...
狦瞷э跑璸购 ê碞睹 And ifyou start changing things now, it'll mess eveything up...
-碞ぃの產倒佩尺 - - and we won't get home in time foryour surprise- - okay.
 Okay. okay.
ゴ耑  Excuse me. hi. hi.
さ边琌и虫ō癸 и稱笵... Lt's my bachelorette party, and, well, l wasjust wondering...
ぃ倒и1じ Ifyou wanted to pay a dollar to...
礛眖и︾狝ǐ遏縸 Well, suck a piece ofcandy offmy shirt.
倒10じ 簎 Here's 1 o, but leave me the fuck alone.
サ ㄠ Nice throw, son.
傣μ 临琌и Hey, tommy, it's me again.
钮帝 и稱さΝㄆ薄笵簆 Look. l, uh- l want to apologize for this morning.
ぃ琌岿 琌卖鹤 Lt's-lt's notyour fault thatyour dad's a fuck-up.
Τ倒иゴ筿杠 и踞み Just call me when you can. l'm worried about you and-
и稲 L- l loveyou, okay?
 ǎ Okay. bye.
糑 狟ね 腊Γ盾 Hey, guy! little help here?
-洱或ㄆ -禣狹班皊 - oh! what the hell is wrong with you? -just wasted a beer.
叫倒и狹马糕﹊此б Hi. can l have ajameson on the rocks, please?
螟减ぱ Tough day?
糑 尺舧扒ガ糕﹊吹ㄠ - hey! browns girl. -
-硂產皊盾 -硂或弧 - what, doyou live in this bar? - practically.
俱玭场舮Λェ秸馋Λ皊琌程 Tony makes the best mojitos in south beach.
иレ ㎡ And it's eva, by the way.
 и霉 Hi. l'm ron.
霉 硂ㄠㄓ暗ぐ或 So, ron, what's going on?
и虫ō癸 L am- l am here for my bachelor party.
虫ō癸 Your bachelor party? oh, well.
痷琵иア辨 и粄稲 That bums me out. l thoughtyou were cute.
谅谅 и痷琌...胐璝佩 Oh, um, thankyou. l'm, uh l'm flattered.
淮肞  и琌秨 Easy, cowboy. l'm just bustin' your balls.
и璹盉 - hello. l'm engaged too. -
ぱ罢 –ひ孽常硂或甧腇盾 God, is eveyone from cleveland this gullible?
╯ 琌 絋琌 They have done studies. yeah, yeah.
ê 非称ぐ或挡盉 So, uh, when is your big day, hmm?
и酵 Well, wejust started dating a year ago.
┮и㎝Λェぇい и琌程ぃ So, between you, me and tony, l'm not exactly in a rush.
笵 иぃ稱デ沧ネ岿粇 L don't wanna make a lifelong mistake. you know what l mean?
Λェ 陈沸倒и狹 Tony, can l have another, please?
摆 ぃ璶炳и Ah, don't kill me!
-峨 -и⊿ㄆ и 揪 ぃび - seth! - l'm fine. l'm fine. l'm fine. whoa. not fine.
и惠璶 и惠璶 и媚柑 L need- l need my- where's my medication?
и粄ê璂ǐ L think the fat boy took them.
痷琌び Oh, that'sjust great!
砛硂瞺 Maybe this will help.
谅谅 Thanks.
垛...瓳...羘... Oh. uh, so, you, um- you have a really nice-
羘钮 佰琌ぐ或簈 You have a really nice voice. what was that song you were singing?
ê琌и竒盽㎝纯笵ひ That's a song l used to sing when l was a little girl with
癬佰簈 mygreat-grandfather, adolph.
и⊿ㄆ 弧び份份ぐ或ㄓ帝 L'm fine. you said your- your grandpa who?
иび份份 笵ひ - my great-grandfather, adolph! -
- 玭瑆 -琌 - he's so sweet. he lives in south america. - yeah, l bet.
–秅常倒иゴ筿杠 he calls me eveyweek.
辨и㎝妓蝴厩美砃 And he wants me to go to art school like he did in vienna.
-揪 美砃厩 êΤ届 -琌 - oh, art school. that's-that's fun. - yes.
-琌и癸美砃⊿Τ砍届 -琌盾 - but l'm not interested in art. - no.
и尺舧現獀 - l like politics. -
腊ирê俱瞺媚筁ㄓ盾 Uh, can you- can you give me, maybe, the whole bottle?
ㄢる иフ狟ね┮闽み Two months? l seeyour friend's point.
窾琌硈吏炳もぇ摸或快 What ifshe turns out to be a serial killer or something?
и纯竒蛤趁ル穦笵琌в L was once dated a guy for six months. he turned out to be gay.
-砛琌硑Θ -荡癸琌и - maybeyou made him gay. - oh, l definitely made him gay.
и常蛤玂50絏禯瞒 L used to outdistance him on the driving range by 50 yards.
-┦攀 -蔼焊ひ - pansy. - you golf too, huh?
-垛 - иЧ跑Θв - mm-hmm. - all right. l totallywould have gone gay foryou also.
и種 ぃ琌┮Τ╧ フи種盾 L mean, not without the whole man- you know what l'm saying.
 琂礛糒ぺ硂或并и叫狹 Well, sir, flattey will getyou another drink.
单单 ぃぃ иぃ耻 Wait. no, no. l can't. l can't. l can't. l got this, uh...
и临眔舮 Beach blanket bingo t_ing to go to here.
 瞒秨и はタиΤΛェ Fine. leave me. l got tony.
竒Τ Oh. well, you've got the world then.
ぃ癬妓 Hey, why don'tyou come with?
и粄ネぃ赣卖虫ō癸 L don't think a girl should crash your bachelor party.
ǐ 禣耻皊 綤ヰ Come on. it's free booze and drunk spring break kids.
边临辨璶ぐ或 What more could you possibly want from an evening?
τи册册杆耿珇㎝︸甉溉 Plus, we can gab about centerpieces and bridesmaids' dresses.
禣皊护碽и You had me at ''free booze.''
-ǎ ひ孽霉 - - l'll seeyou there, cleveland ron. - all right.
峨 或ㄆ 官璸 Hey, seth. what's goin' on, man?
т傣μ盾 珃 Hey, any luck finding tom? whoa!
⊿ㄆ 峨 All right. um, you feeling okay, seth?
и⊿ㄆ┣㎡ No. l am far from okay. okay?
и惠璶и媚 琌糕此ǐ L needed my medication, onlyjason took it.
┮疭扒纯甝倒и瞺で狶 So hitler's granddaughter gave me some ofthese aspirin.
ぃ⊿Τノ はτ跑Θ硂妓 Only now eveything still hurts and l have this!
ウ琌セㄓ碞舠Θê妓盾 Ls it supposed to curve like that, man?
-ぃ琌 -ぱ罢 - no! - holybabyarm!
-硂常琌岿 -硂或穦琌и岿 - this is all your fault! - okay, how is thdt my fault?
иゎ礹媚 τир岸 Because you took my codeine, so l took a bunch ofyourviagra!
êぃ琌岸 璊差 ê琌偿皑XL Okay, that's not viagra, captain hook. that's equine xl.
单单 ê琌ぐ或狥﹁ Wait a minute. what's equine xl?
ê琌倒皑Ё锭媚 и呼禦 Lt's boner pills for horses. l get it offthis veterinayweb site.
-痷盾 -癸 眏 - oh, yeah? - yeah, it's awesome.
и眔呼 L gotta get that site.
р媚杆で狶媚瞺柑 フ猫 Theywere in an aspirin bottle, you degenerate asshole!
癸ぃ癬 絤策耞 - well, excuse me for exercising a little discretion.
絤策耞 - ''exercising discretion''?
и稱ぃΤゑ"絤策"㎝"耞" L can't think oftwo words that have less in common with you...
蛤Τ翴迭 Than ''exercise'' and ''discretion''!
摆 杠琵端み 峨 Ouch. that hurt, seth.
иぃゎ璶琵端み 硂馒贺 L'm gonna giveyou something to hurt about, you motherfucker! come on!
 峨 氨ㄓ all right, all right! seth, stop. stop.
短ナ 短ナ Wet noodle! wet noodle.
╆簆ゴ耑 ぃ恨稦ぐ或 Sory to interrupt... whatever this is.
癸盢10だ牧ぇ秨﹍ The, uh, partystarts in about 1 o minutes.
┮ ...荷е挡 So, you know, ifyoujust... finish up soon.
 峨 и谋眔莱赣 All right, seth, l think you should, um-you should go and...
秆∕猵 You know, take care ofyour little... situation.
-琌盾 琌盾 - и笵 - yeah? oh, yeah? - okay, l got it.
иРㄓ秆∕ Wejust, uh, call a little call girl.
ぃ ぃ ぃ No, no, no.
иぃ穦琵Τ痜Р篘и L am not letting some diseased hooker touch me down there.
и穦т爱瞓Рㄓ篘 We'll get a nice clean hooker to touch you down there.
衡 官璸 弧 Forget it, fellas. all right?just forget it.
琌炊柑壳盾 So, uh, are those capri pants?
硂ぃ琌炊柑壳 ガ柑壳琌 They're not capri pants. capri pants are forwomen.
┮硂碞琌╧Α炊柑壳 Oh. so they're man-pri pants?
ぃ琌 硂琌きだ壳 No. look, they're cropped slacks, okay?
稼瑆舧 獶盽舧 They're huge in europe. huge.
踌獀邻焊稼瑆舧 Yeah, george michael's huge in europe too.
Τ稱筁拦竲吏盾 You ever thought ofmaybe an ankle bracelet?
-穦ㄠ碞ㄓ盾 -癸 穦ㄠ碞ㄓ - is he gonna be down soon? - yeah. he'll be down in a minute.
淮翴 Be gentle.
叫ノ  Hereyou go, ladies.
谅谅 ケ┰ - thankyou, flora. -
и硂柑稦ぐ或 иぃ琌╆ぐ或 What are we doing here? not that l'm complaining...
琌笵 讽砆皊碍 But, you know, the odds ofbeing thrown up on...
ōΤ苯砍摆 By a hardened alcoholic have dropped significantly.
洱洱㎡ Speaking of. where's mom?
"と何" She's, uh, taking one ofher ''naps.''
摆 穦琌街㎡ - - ah. l wonderwho that could be.
-或ㄆ -иぃ笵 - what's going on? - l don't know.
ぃ 癬ㄓ钩и紁┬簗 Oh, no. it appears we have some sort ofwater leak.
┮恨ㄓ The plumber's here!
ゴ耑  Excuse me, ladies.
и笵硂柑恨笵翴拜肈 l understand you're having some problems with your plumbing.
ㄓиぃ眔ぃ鼻и疭ㄣ l may have to pull out my special tool for this job.
ぃ璶踞み и瞶恨笵よиΤ竒喷 Don'tyou wory. l'm accustomed to working with a lot of pipe.
ぱ罢 綾琌μ綾盾 Oh, my god! are thosejimmy choo's?
ケ┰ Flora!
恨 ㄓ 恨 ㄓ 恨 ㄓ Go, plumber! go, plumber! go, plumber!
恨 ㄓ 恨 ㄓ 恨 ㄓ Go, go! go, plumber! go, plumber! go, plumber!
恨 ㄓ 恨 ㄓ Go, go! go, plumber! go, plumber!
恨 ㄓ 恨 ㄓ Go,go! go, plumber! go, plumber!
恨 ㄓ 恨 ㄓ - go, plumber! go, plumber! - ##
恨 ㄓ 恨 ㄓ Go, go! go, plumber!
腤腤帝硂稦估 What in fuck's name is going on?
硂趁ル琌ゴㄓ And where did tommytune here come from?
洱洱 硂琌宾焊虫ō癸 琌叉︾籖╧ Mother! it's mel's bachelorette party. this is the stripper.
顿 產痷簘獹 Hi. loveyour house.
谅谅 履产 Thanks, sally.
摆 而乃 Jesus, autumn!
硂趁ルゑ柑ㄤ常尺舧 This guy likes cock more than anyone else in this room.
-ぃ種 洱洱 иタ砍繷 -弧 - excuse me, mother, but we were in the middle- - but nothing.
иㄠ或虫ō癸 No daughter of mine is going to have a one-man rendition...
叫籖╧ㄓ竩浩╣ O5 _ chorus line for her bachelorette party.
瓳 琌盾  ê稱或快㎡ Oh, really? well, what do you wanna do that's so great?
и弄贾场摆 - we'll go to my book club. -
瓳 и璶ê 硂碞 Oh, l'll take that. definitely don't need that.
-瓳 -谅谅 - oh. - thanks.
-璶盾 -讽礛 - you got it? - yeah.
- -ネ 穛и盢拨ネ螟а - all right. - gentlemen, to a night we will never forget.
-爱狹 - - cheers. - hear! hear!
穦ǎ 官璸 Seeya later, guys.
-摆 и谋眔Τ翴穡 -⊿ㄆ - whoa. whoa. feeling a little woozy. - you all right?
硂贺玨癬┾爱и福﹀ L think this erection's draining the blood from my brain.
и稱 L'm disgusting.
 皊ψ狟ね 霉 常琌ㄇ皊ψ狟ね Okay, okay. fair-weather friends, ron. those are fair-weather friends.
иぃ穦琵瘆胊虫ō癸 L am not gonna let a little pissin' and moanin' ruin your bachelor party.
-盾  -癸 - all right, brother? yeah! - all right.
-单 -ǐ - hang on a second. - and off he goes.
瓳 谅谅 Oh. well, thankyou.
痷? ウ琌ぃ琌娩峨う貉吹摆 Really? does that come with a side of tampax?
ぃ琌弧さ边 さ边и璶ㄉVIP笿 Not tonight. tonight we roll v.l.p.
狦盉搂⊿Τ Lfyou don't already have someone performing yourwedding,
и琌戮穨畍 l'm also a licensed minister.
摆 ê痷琌伐 Uh, that would bejust lovely.
硂碞琌┮孔弄贾场 Rhjs is your book club?
癠 罽 Come on! go home!
癚菇罢 Nobody likes you.
 碞凡穦 For the love of god, take a rest!
碞琌弧 矗ㄑ花地免ó狝叭 癸盾 So, you guys offer limo service, right?
羆参甅┬ The presidential suite.
ㄠ иゴ戒瞷﹚緅 克稲 Now, bachelorette, l'll bet you're hungy, my dear.
稱ㄓ翴疦绘盾 Would you care for a scone?
霉吹イイ? Grandma rose?
 и克稲宾狶笷 Well, hello, melinda dear!
らセ碍щ罢 驹挡罢 Thejapanese have surrendered! the war is over!
びイイ Great-grandma?
и蔼砍盾 Would you look at us?
绑弄贾场 Four generations together at book club.
и翴皊 L need a refill.
癠 腳ī 惠璶凡凡摆 Come on, baby. daddy needs a rest.
-官璸  荐乃乃峻 -ぃ ウ... - hey, fellas, look, a hot tub! - no, it's-
ウタ玂緄 ぃ癸秨 иタ睲瑍㎡ Lt's closed for maintenance. l'm cleaning it.
癬ㄓ钩籸疍摆 Looks like a clothing optional tub too.
и砆 - - l'm stuck!
-╆簆 -瓳 ぱ - excuse me. - oh, god!
癬ㄓぃ岿摆 Looks nice.
顿 и瞦﹚临⊿穌﹚ Well, well, l thought you hadn't made it.
ぃ種 и穝ゴш Sory, l wasjust freshening up.
瓳 ゴш眔临痷簘獹摆 Oh. you freshen up nice.
倒 ㄆΘぇ倒 Halfnow, halfafter.
ㄆΘぇ 琵ǎ醚痷タ╧ And when you're done, you come party with a real man.
钮癬ㄓ痷ぃ岿 Sounds great.
穌﹚ - go get him. -
非称盾 荐籖ゑ辽タΑ秨﹍ get it ready! it's time for the hot bodydance contest!
瞷 Now,
穘眔程 墓眔程磝羘盢莉眔500じ whoever shakes her thing for the crowd and gets the most applause wins $500!
常钮フ盾 - areyou with me? -
 初琌и┦稰柑吹甫 Yeah! first up is sexy kirstie.
糑 ллㄅ┬碞寥500遏 Hey, 500 bucksjust for shaking your tits?
莱赣刚刚 官璸 珆珆稲伐 You should get in on that, man. you got lovely tits.
ウ B竛狹盾 What are they, a full ''b'' cup?
ぃ琌璶тア萝ㄠ㎝ゼㄓ玡ヾ盾 Don'tyou have, like, a lost child and future ex-wife to find?
笵盾 и端み и痷端み You know what? that cut. that cut real deep.
и癬仅钩в盾 Ls it gay that we're in this hammock together?
-ㄓ碭癡絤ΤΘ摆 -糑 - looks like her years of tap lessons paid off. - hey.
珃 坟礛穝 痷簘獹 Wow. uh, this is new. okay. you look amazing.
и...琌盾 L'm-areyou on next or something?
и竒砆瞊∣罢 L got disqualified. 'roids.
摆 癸 и痷胔好琌皊碍 Ah, yes. see, l suspected you might be ajuicer.
-馋Λ皊? -タい胔 - mojito? - you speak my language.
-ǐ - - shall we? - ah, yes.
ゴ耑  叫拜惠璶蔓Ю皊盾 Excuse me, ladies. may l interestyou in a cocktail?
瓳  и玡㎝堵何筁㎡ Oh, yes. l slept with a colored man once.
-糔 -琌癳イ罢 - shh! - he was the milkman.
堵 Oh, he was so big, and black as night.
- 洱洱  -êぱ讽礛琌癳イ罢 - okay, mother. okay. - he sure delivered the milk that day!
 ア抄 Okay, uh, ifyou'll all excuse me.
и霉稦估 T'm gonna g_ l'm gonna check in with ron.
瓳 Λ紈 ㄓ霉а筿杠 Ooh, todd. looks like ron forgot his phone.
瓳 诀穦  ﹉甉 еǐ е Oooh, score. all right, ladies. get lost. go.
 繷ǎ Okay. seeya.
и琌霉 - - ron's phone.
糑 Λ紈? Hey. todd?
瓳 顿 宾焊 笵盾 Oh, hi, mel. you knowwhat?
иセ稱霉 ぃ筁瞷ぃびよ獽 L would get ron, but he's a little, uh, indisposed at the moment.
-琌ぃ琌 跑紾 -ぃ琌罢 - is he throwing up? he's- he's kind of a light weight. - not exactly.
宾焊 絋﹚痷稱㎝硂趁ル挡盉盾 Mel, are you sure you want to invite this guy into our family?
或 What?
钮帝 霉р硂柑何筂 Listen, ron has been sleeping with eveything in a skirt out here.
琌ぃ琌逼临琌ぐ或 侈? Do you guys have some kind of arrangement or something? hello?
宾焊 - mel? -
 眃快そ 祇癩诀穦 Next stop, corner office! more shots!
-瓳 -诀穦 - ooh! - shots!
硂セ碞ぃ钩霉 Lt doesn't seem like ron at all.
┋莲の痷ヘ It's better you found out now.
Ω单何帝 澄奔矹矹 毙癡毙癡 Next time he falls asleep, cut one of his balls off. that'll teach him.
瞷弧硂ㄇ 洱洱 Not now, mother!
-さ边иゲ斗ǎ -稱邻盞 - l have to see him. tonight. - you want to go to miami tonight?
иゴ倒 иГ诀 L'll call your father. we can take the jet.
瓳  狟ね 琵и倒Б瓆翴磝羘 Ooh-hoo. all right, guys, give it up one more time for candy!
 程 All right. last but certainly not least...
琵иΤ叫簘獹 糕此 We have the beautiful... jason?
-瓳 иぱ -瓳 摆 - oh, my god! - oh, god.
簎 硂フ猫 Get off the stage, loser!
 狟ね 痷琌び浩╣ All right, guys. this is crazy.
硂琌иΤㄓ材Ω瞷キも For the first time in club histoy we have a tie...
Б瓆 - between candy... -
㎝糕此ぇ丁 - and jason! -
ㄨ 種帝 Now, right here, that can only mean one thing.
и璶辽初 l'm talking about a dance of_
-块﹚ 璂 -瓳 р珆珆獹ㄓ摆 - you're going down, fatty. - oh, bring it on, sugar tits.
Τ叫Б瓆 First up, candy!
ネ ﹉甉 Don't get mad, girl.
瓳 硂妓ぃ Oh, that is not nice.
瓳  块﹚ 块﹚ Oh, man, you can't beat that. you can't beat that.
糕此... Jason!jason!jason!
糕此... Jason!jason!jason! jason!jason!
糕此... Jason!jason!jason!
и莉秤 碞琌и糕此 We have a winner! big jason!
иぃ笵 L do not know where they are.
盿ㄇКぐ或皊┍ - maybe they took a few groupies back to the hotel or something. -
琌и临琌ぱ跑睤 Is it me or is it freezing?
 и 稱ǐ盾 Um, we can go. you-you wanna go?
- ǐ - - yeah, let's go. - all right.
-糑 霉㎝レ癬ǐ -び - hey, hey. ron just left with eva. - perfect.
絋玂Θ р硂ㄠ常┬丁 Just to be sure, get evey hot piece of ass here back to the suite.
 糑 и赣或蛤弧摆 Okay. hey, what should l tell them?
硂临ノи毙? L don't give a shit.
倒и穌﹚ ぃ礛碞ǐひ孽 get it done or you're gonna be walking back to cleveland.
-笵盾 - - all right? - okay.
谅谅  и冠稱帝眔硂 Yeah. thanks, bro. man, l've always wanted one of these.
官璸 官璸 Guys! guys!
筁ㄓ 瓳 稰谅 稰谅 Come here. oh, thank god. thank god!
セぃ笵иΤ篏 You have no idea what l've been through.
ри眖硂骸琌︾砰磂羚柑 help me get me out of this chlamydia stew!
癠  come on, man!
и祇粆 璶琌琵и笿硂妓フ猫 L swear to god, if l see any more man junk on this trip,
и﹚ри泊氟ㄓ l'm gonna gouge my eyes out.
-瞷笵街ゑ耕フ猫 -тК - who's the degenerate now? - okay? get a girlfriend.
-ぃ琌 -┪т﹁ナ - areyou serious? - get a watermelon.
ぃ琌 糑 ㄓ Areyou serious? hey, come on!
и谋眔и矹矹竒⊿ L- l think l lost a ball!
糑 官璸  荐乃乃峻 Hey, fellas, look, a hot tub.
и踞み 临Τ и稲 笵盾 L'm worried about you, and l love you. okay?
 ǎ Okay, good-bye.
-痷┣ -ぐ或 - that was weird. - what?
и иさぱ琜... My dad. we had a fight today...
τ澈礛笵簆 硂琌材Ω笵簆 And he actually apologized, which is a first.
糑 诀 硂柑Τ┰OK┍盾 Hey, driver, are there anykaraoke bars around here?
ㄓ Τ叫и鸽吹ヅ甫﹊筽皊┍┬丁 Get down here! this guy just invited us to justin timberlake's hotel room!
尺城ひ莉眔礚┦ネ贱彻 Congratulations to jeff for earning his one-year chip!
钡ㄓ Τ叫ī甫 莉眔贱彻 And next up, we have betty who has earned her six-month chip.
е筁ㄓ摆 ī甫 Come on up here, betty!
ゴ耑 硂琌甫﹊筽╣舧皊穦盾 Excuse me. is this the timberlake orgy?
- ぃ琌 ┤ぃ琌 -癸ぃ癬 - um, no, afraid not. - sory.
ī甫  ī甫 单单 Betty? where areyou? betty? wait!
ぃ ǐ ﹚璶激辨 No, don't go! you must avoid your lust triggers!
-鸽吹ヅ - -justin!
珃 钩候眎摆 Wow. you look tense.
 琌摆 痷琌候眎秅ソ и拜 Uh, yeah, yeah. it's been a tense weekend. let me ask you something.
虫ō癸碞琌琵琘弧狝虫ō簙 Ls a bachelor party the last chance for someone to convince the bachelor...
程Ωデ岿粇盾 That they're making a huge mistake? is that it?
иぃ笵 粄㎡ L don't know. areyou?
-ぐ或 デ岿盾 -琌摆 - what? making a mistake? - yeah.
иぃ笵 и⊿Τ I don't know. l- l don't think so.
⊿Τ? ê 狦êぃ琌痷稲 иぃ笵ê琌ぐ或 You don't think so? well, ifthat's not true love, l don't know what is.
 ê禬醇紌... Okay, well, in your infinite wisdom...
砛禗и 或笵ゼ盉ひ碞琌痷㏑ぱ㎡ Maybe you can tell me how do you know that your fianc?is the one?
и眖ㄓ常⊿弧筁琌и痷㏑ぱ L never said he was.
ê或 êぐ或璶氮莱 Well, why did you say ''yes''?
и稱 琌и―盉 Cause he asked, l guess.
罖 и盉戳临⊿篤﹚㎡ Look, l'm not the one with the wedding date.
ネ璚祏 иゲ斗絋﹚ぃ穦デ岿 Life is short and l want to be sure.
-и稲邻盞 -ェ - l love miami. - sonny.
瓳 糑 ī甫 Oh. hey, betty.
иΤㄇ狟ね 惠季饥 So, l've got a few friends that are in need of your expertise.
-瓳  - 筁ㄓ ﹉甉 - oh. well, okay. - all right. come on, girls.
иぃ笵 ī甫 и琌弧 иρ痷仓 L don't know, betty. l mean, my penis is really tired.
单ρ 礛碞ヰ your cock can sleep when it's dead.
-来盾 -癸 - okay? - yeah, yeah. yeah!
- и稦初 -瓳 び - okay. yeah, let's do this! - oh, good!
 锣材丁 Okay, first bedroom on the right.
瑿 и单ぃの 緑蔼ゝ 暗非称 Yeah, l can't wait. tall. blonde. you're getting it.
иǐ и Here you go. l'm outta here. witness the sickness!
顿 从翴祇 Hey. go get some hair plugs.
癠 霉ㄠ Come on. where's ron?
иぱ My god!
и笵琌┦稲╣ 琌 癠 - l know they're sex addicts, but come on! -
Τǎ筁盾 ǎ筁盾 You guys seen a kid, huh? anybody, you seen a kid?
ǎ筁盾 You seen a kid?
-糑 峨 -糑 - hey, seth. - hey.
- 或眖ê荐峻柑ㄓ -иぃ稱弧 - how'd you get out of the hot tub, man? - l don't want to talk about it.
峨ぺ吹甫 μ疭 硂琌紈柑 Sebastian and meat, this is derek.
紈柑 硂琌峨ぺ吹甫㎝μ疭 Derek, sebastian, meat.
Τ筁傣μ盾 Haveyou seen, uh- seen tommy an_here?
-⊿Τ ぃ種 -㎡ μ疭 - no, sory. - meat?
  杠禗и 傣μ All right. let me know, man. tommy?
и璶瑍菌丁程峻 Well, l'm gonna take the longest shower in recorded histoy.
獽 Makeyourselves at home.
傣μ Tommy!
傣μ 罢 Tommy. where have you been?
и踞み 帝ぐ或摆 I've been so worried aboutyou. what areyou wearing?
-硂狟ね琌街 - 硂琌ェ哉划焊玭紈吹茎滇 - who's your friend? - dad, this is sonia hernandez murphy.
茎滇  痷琌びォ ㎝иρ盋﹎ Murphy. okay, okay. yeah, same last name. small world.
ρ 碞琌琎边谤 Dad, this is the woman you married last night.
瓳 ぱ и╆簆 Oh, my god! l'm so sory.
и⊿粄 笵琎边 L didn't recognizeyou. you see, last night-
穡 - you were hammered. -
ǎ蔼砍 Lt's so good to seeyou!
 Okay, okay.
傣μ и㎝酵酵盾 Yeah. uh, tommy, can l seeyou for a sec?
ア抄ェ哉 Excuse me, sonia.
琌或т How did you find her?
и碭KTV L checked out a couple karaoke bars.
ぐ或? KTV? What? karaoke bars?
ρ 尺舧K簈 洱洱尺舧 Dad, you love karaoke. mom loves karaoke.
ㄤ玡ヾ尺舧 ê材﹚ぃ穦ㄒ So doyour other ex-wives. so whywould number four be any different?
钮帝 琌胺ō毙絤 Now listen. she's an aerobics instructor...
尺舧宾贾皊 癚菇┾废 临產柑緄邻盞砨 Loves merlot, hates smoking, and her family owns the miami dolphins.
-硂琌痷盾 -琌碔盋 - holy shit. really? - yeah, she's loaded.
ぃ璶穌瘂 ㎝ㄓ册册 So don't blow this. now go talk toyourwife.
-ェ哉 - sonia! -
痷爱瞓俱霍摆 It's so clean and organized.
临痷琌ㄥ紈瓣 Lt's so german.
ρぱ Oh, my god.
峨 Seth!
腐笷  и琌稱ㄇ瑀 Gerda. hi. l was...just gonna borrow some purell.
硂ぃ琌稱钩ê妓 и琌... No, it's not- it's not what it looks like. l was-
-瓳 峨 -ぃ - oh, seth! - no!
-峨 ㄓ - - oh, seth, yes! - okay.
и临眖⊿挡筁盉 Well, l-l- l've never been married...
┮и癸硂⊿ぐ或び竒喷 So l don't have a lot ofexperience with this subject matter.
琌㎝宾焊 But with mel...
稰谋 Thingsjust feel right.
硂妓 What about this?
-稰谋盾 - 琌 稱耻狹盾 - does this feel right? - uh- l, um- l, uh-who needs a drink?
 爱狹 Yes, let's have a toast.
- -祏甶ネ - oh, yeah. - to life being short.
单单 иぃ硂妓 Wait, wait, wait, wait. we-we can't-we can't do this.
и笵и┮匡拒琌癸 L know that what l'm doing is right.
и﹚宾焊琌и斑 And mel is the one for me. l'm sure ofthat.
и笵ゼ盉ひ And l know thatyour fianc?..
琌礚ゑ┋笲╧ Is an incredibly lucky man...
镑谤钩硂或 To be marying an amazing woman like- likeyou.
-癸ぃ癬 -ぃ ぃ惠璶璶笵簆 - l'm sory. - don't. please, don't apologize.
и璶笵簆 и⊿Τ璶挡盉 Yes, l-l should because l'm- l'm not getting married.
иセぃ琌ぐ或 And l'm far from an amazing woman.
琌琌痷タ╧ Butyou're a really good guy...
ぃ钩Λ紈ê妓 Unlikeyour buddytodd.
ぐ或 What?
ρぱ Jesus!
-峨 峨 -и璶 - oh, seth! seth! - l'm going to hell!
и璶瞡 癸ぃ癬 イイ L'm going to hell, but it's okay. l'm sory, grandma!
и癸ぃ癬 - t'm so sory! -
-ぱ -瞡 - oh, god! - yeah! yeah! yeah!
稦ぐ或 霉㎡ What areyou doing here? where's ron?
‵舮何帝 ヴ叭ЧΘ Sleeping it offon the beach. mission accomplished.
痷盾 靡沮倒и Really? well, l need proof.
и╃酚 Oh, l've got it. pictures galore.
び ㄓ Excellent. let's see.
и琌瞷酚 临琌 We could do that now, or...
紋 You and l could celebrate.
ゑ Billy.
 Leave now.
瓳 癸 By the way...
и尺舧偿 - - l like to get wild.
尺舧 癸盾 Λ紈 You like to get wild, don'tyou, todd?
糑 璸 Hey, fellas.
耻 耻 耻... Drink! drink! drink! drink! drink! drink!
瑿 窾烦 - - mazel tov!
ê柑 Where is she going?
產 и禗ぱ快瞶瞒盉 She went home. l told her l'd see her tomorrow at the annulment.
ぃ璶 硂或 You're not gonna stay with her? she's perfect!
и笵 и禗 L know that, buddy, but l told her...
ひ孽и临Τ璶ㄆ薄璶暗 L've got a couple offew vey important things back in cleveland.
び镍 琌碔盋 That was stupid. she's rich!
肞翴 и临穦穦 You gotta relax, okay? we're still dating.
ê盢琌戳ê贺闽玒 we're gonna do the long-distance thing.
и临ぃê或短ぃ 单 L'm not that stupid. right? hang on a sec.
и弧 次伐 See, he was wondemul.
ゴ磐  Excuse me, ladies.
иセぃ稱拜硂 Hi. l, uh- l hate to ask this...
糕此┏... But what exactly isjason's-
癸ぃ癬 琌ェ┏Τぐ或筁ぇ矪 Uh, sonny's secret?
风 иぃ笵或弧 ê琌界 L don't know what to tell you, rico. it's a god-given talent.
-碞钩竧ダ疭柑履 -单 - he's like motherteresa. - wait a minute.
竧ダ疭柑履 He's like motherteresa in the sack?
琌 и辨ㄇ Yeah, he is. l just wish he was staying longer.
иΤび惠璶獀励 There are so many more ofus that need to be cured.
獀励 ê趁ル斑暗碞琌疦籐 Cured? the only thing that guy could cure is a ham!
и琌┦稲╣ 刚┮Τよ猭 L've been a sex addict all my life. l have tried eveything.
琌筿励ヰ励猭 常⊿ノ ㎝暗 Even electroshock therapy. nothing worked... until l slept with sonny.
и秨﹍稰 潸み Lt was so- foul.
иぃ稱暗稲 琌ぱㄏ L don't think l'll ever have sex again! he's an angel.
琌 絋龟琌ぱㄏ Hey, he is an angel.
-谅谅 -ぃノ谅 - well, thanks, ladies. - yeah, sure.
琌ぱㄏ He's an angel.
珃 и痷琌弘痟很 Whoo! l am wiped out.
êㄇ瞅帝иК眔钩把吹㈱狹 Man, those chicks were passing me around like the stanley cup in there.
-и稱琌 痷鸡 -ェ霉膀疭次伐 - l bet theywere, you pathetic- - sonny crockett, you're the man.
и琌荷τ и璶тㄇ耻干だ Ah, l do my best. now, l gotta find a little beverage, replenish my fluids.
 Yeah.
и稱倒ざ残 L was gonna rip him a new one.
Τㄇ莱赣琵眔種眔種 Sometimes you gotta letyour buddies have their little moment in the sun,
盾 okay?
猵 иッ环ノ硂讽 And besides, we're gonna be able to hang this over him forever.
⊿岿 Oh, yeah.
ㄓ ие翴秨﹍ Ooh. mmm, all right. come on. let's do this.
-临Τンㄆ -ぐ或 - one more thing. - what?
璶稦ぐ或 What-what areyou doing?
笵盾 Λ紈 癸и弧êㄇ и稱 Well, you know, todd, l thought a lot about whatyou said...
琌癸 And you were right.
-и稱Ω3P -и弧琌2 盾 - l do want a threesome. - l meant two girls, okay?
琌2 Two girls! okay?
ㄓ 官璸 Come on, buddy.
ぃ琌稱玦┕玡估 Don'tyou wanna go balls to the wall?
иぃ璶 No, l-l- l don't.
瞦瞦或妓 и⊿ㄆ Guess what eveybody. l'm free from my penis!
沧硁ㄓ び L'm totally flaccid. it's great!
ぐ或 皑弘睪甮Ч What, did your horse stif_juice run out?
临⊿Τ Not exactly.
璶ê種ㄠ稦盾 What areyou gonna do with that?
-瓳 -峨 - oh. - seth.
-ㄓㄓ -ê洪 - rar, rar, rar, rar. - you slept with the nazi?
Τ间聖 碞㎝и妓 She's a total neat freak, man,just like me.
и稱ǎ琌㏑い猔﹚ l t's like we were destined to meet.
-峨琌礢び -иぃ稱暗礢び び瞡 - seth, you're ajew. - a self-loathingjew. it's perfect!
Τ⊿Τǎ霉 Hey, have, uh, you guys seen ron?
ぱ摆 Oh, god. oh, god.
霉 钮帝 硂 Ron, listen, it's cool.
и尺舧 硂 盾 иぃ尺舧硂妓 Okay, it's cool. l likeyou. okay? this isjust- it's not my thing!
-―― -繰 - okay? -shh.
璶稱Τ疭稰谋 碞眔繰 Lfthis is going to be special, l need it to be silent.
ぱ摆 Oh, god.
ぱ摆 钮и弧 Oh, god, no. no, listen. listen.
ゑ ぱ 霉稦ぐ或 Hey, billy, haveyou seen- jesus christ! what the fuck, ron?
ぐ或 ぃ ぃ琌稱钩ê妓 What? what? no, it's not what it looks like.
Λ紈稱╊床и㎝宾焊 Todd was tying to break mel and l up...
踞みи穦宾焊ρそ竚 Because he was worried l was gonna replace him at mel's dad's company.
и碞⊿稱璶ê フ猫 и璶宾焊 L don't even want thejob, you dumb shit! all l want is mel.
┮璶ノ眏ㄓ厨確 So in retaliation you decided to rape him?
и瞶秆 L can respect that.
官璸 钩硂柑琌痷タ癸 Hey, fellas, looks like the real party's in here.
硂柑Τぐ或某盾 So, is there an agreed upon safe word orwhat?
ぃ琌稱钩ê妓 - - it's notwhatyou think.
-宾焊 - mel. -
琵и潸み You are sick.
ぃ琌稱钩 单单 Λ紈炒甡и L- no, no, wait! it's not whatyou think. todd set me up!
-单单 克稲 - wait, no. honey! hey! -
ぃ No.
┏弧ぐ或 What the hell is he talking about?
拜拜碞笵 Ask him.
-宾焊 - mel! -
宾焊 Mel!
单单 Wait,wait,waitt hangon!
Λ紈砞璸硂ち璶炒甡霉 癸ぃ癬 So he set this whole thing up to get ron to cheat. sory.
巨 Fuckyou.
-痷盾 -克稲 蓟晾 - is this true? - sweetheart, he's- he's lying.
ゑ 洱砆秨埃 You are so fucking fired, billy!
琌盾 и暗硂或 Really, huh? after all l've done.
碭ㄓ╬┏そ猳 He's been skimming offthe top foryears and sleeping with angela in
临㎝癩叭场ê┰Τ琕 accounting.
癸祇 и禦縀癚 She gave him crabs. l bought the cream.
-璊弧 -睼矹 - bullshit! - bastard!
 產常 Okay, eveybody out ofthe room.
-而乃 克稲 -常倒и - now, autumn, honey- - I said out now.l
-癩叭┰ -腳ī 钮и秆睦 - angela in accounting! - baby, l can explain.
-帝и 矹 - look at me! you son ofa bitch!
宾焊 Mel!
琌иゼ盉ヾ 琌粇穦 Lt's my fianc盯. it's all a big misunderstanding.
-┰ ий隔 - hang on! we're taking a shortcut! -
み - look out! look out! -
宾焊 Mel! mel!
ъよ絃 Take the wheel!
宾焊и酵酵 -ǐ秨 - mel, let's talk. - leave me alone!
霉 Ron!
-霉 -宾焊 钮и弧 - ron! - mel! mel! mel, listen.
钮и弧 Λ紈粄и穦竚 Listen, listen, listen. todd thought l was going to take hisjob.
-┮砞璸炒甡и -ぐ或? - he wanted to get rid ofme, so he's tried to set me up. - he what?
ê┬柑稦ぐ或 и常 - - what wereyou doing in that room? l sawyou!
и稱纞颁 碞琌硂妓τ We werejust tying to scare him, that's all! that's all we were doing.
宾焊罙秆и 笵и稲 Mel, you know me. and you know that l loveyou.
笵иぃ穦腇 and l would never cheat on you.
笵盾 硂秅ソ Come on. listen! this-this weekend...
и┮钮常琌иぃ璶挡盉 L have heard nothing- nothing but reasons whywe should not get married.
笵 弧硂ㄓびе You know, that it's-it's- it's too soon...
弧盉琌糥褂 That marriage is a dead institution...
弧蔼焊ひゴ瑌穦礚册 That golfis boring ifyou play only one hole the rest ofyour life.
弧ぐ或 What areyou talking about?
иぃ笵 L don't know!
钮и弧 и琌弧 Look, look. listen, listen. what l mean is this.
ぃ恨㎝и弧ㄇぐ或 What l'm tying to say is that no matter what anyone else tells me...
и┮稱常琌Ω泊薄春 All l can think about is the next time l get to stare intoyour eyes.
狦иさネ–ぱ常硂妓 And ifl get a chance to do that eveyday for the rest ofmy life...
癸иㄓ弧ネ碞Ч That sounds like a pretty good deal to me.
-и非称╬゜ -非称 - l'm ready to elope. - you're ready to-
и菇暗非穝甉 и稱㎝╬゜ L'm sick ofthis bride-to-be stuff. l'm ready to elope.
琌粄痷盾 Okay. areyou-areyou serious?
и稱紈柑笵よи Cause l think derek actually knows a place that- that we can- could go.
и笵Τ腊и L am-actually, l think l know someone who can help us.
霉腀種谤宾狶笷猭ヾ盾 Doyou, ron, take melinda to be your lawfullywedded wife?
-и腀種 -宾狶笷腀種 - l do. - doyou, melinda...
儿倒霉猭ヾ盾 Take ron to be yourlawfullywedded husband?
и腀種 L do.
び次 霉 Way to go, ron!
-癸ぃ癬宾焊 -⊿ㄆ - sory, mel. - it's okay.
и褐霉柑笷结ぉи舦 By the powervested in me and the state of florida...
挡ひヾ L now pronounce you man and wife.
ㄠ 克穝甉 You may kiss your bride, papi.
稰谅 и緅 Oh, thank god. l'm starving.
и琌 и痷稱ゑ履绘 Yeah, l could really go for a pizza.
尺舧ゑ履绘 You like pizza?
- 舧 - -aloha, welcome!
 и璶霉紈吹箇﹚籩る甅┬ Aloha back atya. last name rhodes, checking into the honeymoon suite!
癸ぃ癬  L'm sory, ma'am.
籩る甅┬砆癸ひヾ箇﹚ it appears the honeymoon suite is booked for another party.
琩琩 琌и籩る Well, check again. it's my honeymoon!
焊ゅ 禗硂璹籩る甅┬ Calvin, tell this man you made the reservation in the honeymoon suite.
-腳ī ㄆ薄琌硂妓 -ぃ璶и腳ī - baby, the thing is- - don'tyou ''baby'' me!
и单俱俱17 L didn't wait 1 7 years...
或ぃ籩る甅┬柑籩る To not have my honeymoon in the honeymoon suite.
顿 籩る甅┬ ﹁籜吹箇﹚ Hi. checking into the honeymoon suite. last name simmons.
 You-
矹 You son ofa bitch!
 痷琌びォ Hey, you. small world, huh?
и璶炳 L'm gonna kill you!
筁ㄓ 癶 浩盾 No, get back! get back! you are nuts!
- 矹 -宾焊 - get over here, you son ofa bitch! - mel! mel!
-簎ㄓ Getyour ass over here!
矹 You son ofa bitch!
-ê琌из -ê琌иダ - that's my ring! - that was my grandmother's ring!
-璊弧 -簎秨 - you little shit! - get away from me!
惠璶獀励  You need some therapy, woman!